Being the new kid at school isn’t easy, and for the last two years, JoJo had been the new kid twice. Of course, it’s just kindergarten, so there aren’t any mean girls yet (you’ll hear about that in another story), and the boys don’t mind playing with the girls at recess as long as they have something to offer, like a good arm for throwing rocks or balls or whatever the game of the hour is for five and six year olds. So, for now, the new kid is just another kid. Unfortunately, everything seems to come in threes these days, and being the new kid would be a “thing” for the third straight year.
We were proud that JoJo was able to be successful in both of the “regular school” preschools that she attended. It was a great victory to be accepted and it was something that other parent embraced. Word spread fast that the Talleys were mixing things up a bit, throwing curve balls, coloring outside of the lines, or whatever other metaphor means doing something out of the ordinary. Both of the schools that we had attended were incredible and adapted so well for JoJo, but they were not equipped for a longer term solution. Neither had resources or teachers with credentials to work with a growing child with Down syndrome or any other developmentally delayed diagnosis. We were going to need to continue our pursuit, but this time with a bigger vision for a longer timespan.
When JoJo was around two years old, I started my original tour of all of the schools in our area, public and private, that had special education classrooms. One that we visited was Saint Richard Catholic School. I knew several typical kids who had graduated from there (it goes only through sixth grade), but I didn’t know anything about the SPED program. I wasn’t impressed. It looked like something straight out of a movie whose plot was always about kids who rebelled and were constantly reprimanded by nuns. Although I didn’t see any nuns in full black robes on my visit I knew they were there somewhere. The stereotype in my mind took over the entire visit and I really didn’t give it a second though. I just checked the box and moved to the next scheduled tour on my list.
“Big mistake… big mistake,” as Julia Roberts says in Pretty Woman when the store owners snob her off because of her initial appearance and presumptive lifestyle (stereotype, for this parallel). It turns out that when we had to go back to the drawing board I scheduled another visit to St. Richard. It’s amazing what a few years of experience and a reality breakdown can do when you re-look at something. This visit to St. Richard was perfect. It felt like a nurturing environment with caring people who love people regardless of who they are. It’s actually a part of their mission statement. Their SPED classroom was fully equipped and staffed to provide students with disabilities the education that they deserve. Their goal is to prepare SPED students for a high school diploma one day. This was the long term solution we had prayed for, and it was right under our noses.
Something interesting happened one day during the first few weeks of JoJo’s first year at St. Richard. She was struggling a bit with paying attention and minding the teacher. That’s a big no-no in our house, so I decided to get to the bottom of it and fix it so that we could resume our course of getting educated.
It turns out that I may have been the problem. I was dropping her off a little early so that she could make friends and have a little play time before school. The teacher was literally calling me everyday to tell me she was having trouble getting JoJo to participate and pay attention. I snuck in one day to observe without her knowing I was there. Of course, she behaves perfectly the first few days I do that. I really believe she has a sixth sense about her – that being that she knows when I’m sneaking around spying on her. One day I dropped her off early, blew her a kiss, told her ‘see you this afternoon’, and then drove around, parked and snuck in another secret way. What I saw next still makes me laugh to this day.
It was a scene straight from The Breakfast Club. All of the other five and six year olds whose parents dropped them off early were huddled around scheming on how to sneak out and skip school (they are five and six, remember). JoJo was right there along with them. A part of me was happy because she had made friends, but the parent part of me wanted to bust up the party as quickly as possible! It really was funny, and it all made sense after that.
After moving her seating around in the classroom to not sit by the early-bird kids, and by dropping her off a little later, the teacher and I found a way to get JoJo on track and to have one of the best years she’s ever had in school.
Fast forward: St. Richard indeed was a great long-term solution. We were in the school for seven years and JoJo graduated along with all of her peers (including the “early birds”) that she started with that first year.
The Breakfast Club for Preschoolers makes me smile and laugh, and I’ll always be grateful to St. Richard. By the way, there were no nuns lurking the halls, only a couple of really cool and great priests who are still to this day making a huge impact on her life.
That little stinker…